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mind dazed

26 Aug
thoughts that go somewhere, but no where in particular

thoughts that go somewhere, but no where in particular

I’ve been pacing around the house and just staring into space lately. Some sort of jittery angst.

Have the habit of checking my email and social network knickknacks more than i should care to. Updates, updates: brain needs that hello and acknowledgement, again and again.

To be heard between the static and the void.



poem on a whim: remembering my tween poetry

25 Aug

back in junior high, i wrote lots of poems
enough to make my future self – yours truly- weep.
i tried so hard back then to be
thoughtful and thought-provoking
but in hindsight it came out pretentious
and syrupy sweet.

but really, high school freshman year
takes the cake in the department of embarrassment
as i presented to my friends a collection of poems called:

me and my purple clouds

if i had known of jimi hendrix’s purple haze at the time, okay makes sense
like i was making some rad reference

but i never knew about the song at all
which made it all the more tragic.

happy belated world water day

22 Mar

Water, it’s an amazing, essential substance. If you ask me, nobody wants a pre-owned bucket of water, especially if it’s labeled ABG (Already Been Gargled). And it’s important enough to have its own spot on the calendar, March 22.

On the UN-Water website, it summarizes how this day came to be:

An international day to celebrate freshwater was recommended at the 1992 United Nations Conference on Environment and Development (UNCED). The United Nations General Assembly responded by designating 22 March 1993 as the first World Water Day.

One organization that’s making a difference in providing access to fresh water is Water Collective, devoted to serving villages in Cameroon including Elah, Muedimel, and Mbenzok. Its approach is unique as it involves partnering with villages and teaching them to be self-reliant. On the About page, it states its approach:

We believe that focusing on making water life-lasting triumphs over rapid expansion with temporary solutions. We believe in long-term strategies that integrate life-cycle costs and collaborate with existing community collectives. We believe that a supportive economy and knowledgeable community are key to clean water and keeping it there. We believe in empowerment before giving, requiring benefitting communities to co-finance their water projects so that they are involved in building their own futures.

Consider today as an opportunity to learn about water with an informative yet entertaining video by Vsauce: Water Is Amazing — World Water Day!. Also, think about supporting an organization like Water Collective in bringing access to fresh water to where it is critically needed.

the hunt for red february

12 Feb

I was browsing the kitchen cabinet in my house, and saw a spider. Normally, I’m not afraid of a spider though slightly creeped out, but this was different. I looked at its body, which was quite round as a tiny bowling ball. A moment later, I saw a flash of the red hourglass on its belly. A black widow. At the edge of the cabinet, two spider skeletons. I recall the spider’s uncanny habit of eating its mate. I do pray that won’t be my fate when I’m in a relationship, sucked dry of emotions and dollar bills with my remains as a warning to forlorn single men about being in love with the wrong woman.

So I did the most practical thing; I procrastinated. I only placed a strip of orange post-it with “black widow sighted” written. That was a week ago.


Today, I was curious. I opened the cabinet and there was some resistance. The spider had already spun a lot of web since then. To feel the strands snapped as I pulled the door creeped me out. The spider scurried about two inches back but still was standing there as if upset with me for ruining its web. I closed it and became resolved in removing this black widow for good.

Moments later, I approached the cabinet wearing yellow kitchen gloves and a jacket. In my hands were a fly swatter and a Radio Shack flashlight, which also doubled as a microscope (30x).

I opened the door widely, and the spider moved a little, still maintaining its distance from me. I tried pounding on it with edge of the flyswatter like a hammer, but it scampered underneath the pan. So I removed the pan along with other kitchenware, and figuring some visual would help in this post, took a snapshot. Then having ample room, I swatted it twice. It was still moving, and to speed its demise, I swatted it and pounded the edge of the flashlight on its body. I did take another snapshot, but I refuse to post it on here; no need to get anymore graphic. I picked it up with a tissue, gave it a squeeze making sure it’s long gone, and threw it away in an outside trashcan.

In hindsight, I could have used the microscope and examined its corpse, but that would have been morbid.


 Moral: This is what happens when you buy a woman the wrong lingerie.


read the fine print

15 Sep

Right now, I’m drinking Uve, a sparkling black cherry lemonade drink. On bottle’s neck, there’s a sticker that reads “gourmet weight loss*” and on a label the annotation accompanying the asterisk reads, “these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. The product is not intended to diagnosis, treat, cure or present any disease.” I heard about many products promising weight loss, but gourmet weight loss? Please, don’t turn a beautiful word like gourmet into something horrible, like premium or pre-approved.

I needed any topic to get me going, and that weird fruity drink did the trick. Maybe the label should have read “Thoughtful Blog Post” or something more possible than weight loss by drinks. And I’m sorry Uve, but didn’t Slim Fast already beat you to it? Oh wait, you’re trying to break into the gourmet weight loss market, with an asterisk. Try hard as you like to make me think it’s possible, but that FDA fine print makes me a bit skeptical.

an introduction i suppose

22 May

So I’m a thinker, and for most of my life, I have considered this identity to be a curse. Well, I never saw myself as a thinker, but rather as an artist who expressed himself and Hallmark crap like that. I had written pages of mediocre junior high poetry and a few dull high school short stories. I even skimmed through a listing of publishers, and sent a query along with a collection of poetry to the literary magazine The Gettysburg Review. It got rejected.

A couple of times, I tried to look for another magazine to send my works to, but to see that it would take months to wait for a response and if it got accepted, a few more months for it to be published, it seemed better to spend my time doing something else, like video games. Also, nobody really bothers reading literary magazines these days.


No one can ignore how social networks have become common and even expected. You learn someone got engaged or had a birthday party in status messages and posted photos. You see links posted to the latest Internet meme or a news story. I learned about the death of Osama Bin Laden when someone in a celebratory mood messaged me on Facebook, and to double-check, I logged onto the Yahoo! homepage. I could imagine the awkward conversation in the future when my child asks me to contribute to his school assignment.

“Well, I was sitting in front of my computer when I heard that Osama died. I was on Facebook, and I went to Yahoo. No, I don’t remember what I had for dinner that day.”

Yet, this miracle of social networks, being able to keep in touch with all sorts of people including classmates, churchgoers, co-workers, etc., does have a dark side. There is this growing unhealthy obsession to see if anyone said anything about you and keep tabs on what so-and-so is saying and doing, whether this so-and-so be your frienemy, secret crush, or ex-spouse. Even a photo from a party could cause someone to wonder why he wasn’t invited. Narcissism and paranoia become natural, and alas, I admit to being prone to them just like anybody else.

What troubles me the most that this miracle discourages people from being individuals and instead encourages them to manufacture a “near-perfect me” identity. Their self-worth is gradually being blended with what they see in a bathroom mirror in the morning and what they see in the computer monitor in the evening. So they make sure their posts and comments are tactful, polite, and at times ironic.

For me, I do enjoy using Facebook and read my friends’ status messages, links to interesting webpages, and photos of food and places I have not tasted and visited. But at the same time, I am a bit troubled of the possible long-term effect this can have on how we perceive ourselves. If we become concerned with what people think of us, how then can we be able to think for ourselves, outside of that peer pressure?

Independent thinkers are what we need more than anything right now. We are drawn to determined superheroes, courageous visionaries, and of course, out-of-the-box thinkers who dared to perceive beyond the social norms in hope of not only making a better world, but also for people to be able to understand themselves and each other, even though they may not agree on everything.

I am aware that I am a perceptive, thoughtful individual, and to only limit myself to a blog would be not enough to communicate my thoughts fully. So you could also find me on Instagram, Youtube, Twitter, and Tumblr (visit the About page for links). In each of the social network being used, they take a different aspect of how I express my ideas. ¹So it does sound a bit overwhelming that I am extending my train of thoughts to such networks, but let’s see where this would take me.

In this blog, I hope to post substantial thoughts in forms of blog entries, essays, short stories, etc. Who are the intended readers? Anyone who is interested in thoughts from this weird guy known as D.L.

¹Crossed out on Feb 8, 2013. Crossing this out was overdue, but my focus on exploring the mentioned social networks has changed. Months later after this entry was written, I decided to focus mostly on this blog for the time being, as of this writing.
²And yea…crossed out the previous footnote on May 22, 2013 because, well, I’m falling back to my originally thesis of expressing myself in different ways.